Yes, I know it’s a small list but I like all three for very particular reasons. Now listen, I’m not going for authenticity here… no Gardeners’ World, Kew Gardens documentaries, Carol’s Plant Odyssey or Designs On Chelsea, no Allotment based Bake Off clones here,this is just a few herbs, plucked, chopped and lightly sprinkled on your supper. So here goes…
1. Rosemary & Thyme – Goodness knows who it was, but someone thought a TV series with a couple of botanically named middle-aged female gardeners solving crimes was a good idea. Felicity Kendal and Pam Ferris play the fragrantly named Rosemary Boxer and Laura Thyme, assisted by guest artists plucked from the finest Great Britain has to offer. These two women, lovely though they both are, are actually an ex police officer and a plant pathologist (you don’t meet many of those at dinner parties) turned professional gardners who seem to attract death and mayhem to the glamorous gardens of England and Europe like broad beans attract black-flie. Garrottings in the Greenhouse, Shootings in the Shed and Stranglings amongst the Strawberries… these herby slueths solve em’ all. I loved it, with all it’s artifice and punny names. Mind you, gardening is stressful enough without some jolly scoundrel creeping up behind you and bashing your head with a hoe as you weed your onion patch.
2. The Herbs – Yeah. Obvious I know but how could I not? Ah. With a cry of ‘Herbidacious’ the Victorian walled garden gate swings open and there you are, confronted by a very friendly lion called Parsley.
“Grrrr….”
Way before my time, but a great favourite of my older sister, who has a great video (yes … VIDEO whatever that is) collection, and showed me a few episodes. The Herbs was a charming BBC children’s show starring – yes , you guessed it, Herbs… mysteriously represented as animals. Sweet some might say, but also very odd and who thought that a bunch of herbs suffering from animal related personality disorders would be a hit. There was a whole herb garden of characters in this programme. The afore–mentioned Parsley the Lion, plus Dill the dog, Sir Basil (The King of the Herbs) Lady Rosemary, Sage the Owl, Bayleaf the Gardner (arrr) professor Onion and the Chives… not to mention Tarragon the Dragon. Created by Paddington author Michael Bond and commissioned in the late sixties (what a surprise – just when mind altering substances were abundant) reliably old fashioned, BBC middle-class and vaguely feudal (Sir Basil likes ‘huntin’, shootin’ and fishin’) it is comforting in the same way that the Clangers is, and was narrated by actor Gordon Rollings… the vocal equivalent of a fleecy blanket, a Catherine Cookson and a Horlicks in front of the fire.
3. A Dinner of Herbs – Talking of Catherine Cookson, here is her personal contribution, a mini-series made in 2000 starring the wonderful, and attractively bearded Tom Gooman-Hill, Johnathan Kerrigan and the always superb Billie Whitelaw. Described in the IMDB as a tale of ‘lust, hate revenge, betrayal and murder (and presumably some herbs) it has the usual heady brew of tough mill workers, high drama rich men, poor men, prety housemaids and so on. I don’t know if any bodices get ripped but I wouldn’t be at all surprised. It’s set in ‘The North’ a place traditionally only found on TV where, in the past, any accent from Lancashire, Yorkshire, Stoke, Newcastle or North Wales would do as long as they were accompanied by the occasional ejaculation of ‘Appen’ or ‘eck as like’. It’s all more authentic these days sadly. It’s hard to work out where the dinner of herbs of the title fits into the story,
“Vegetables? What are you? A Southerner? Leave this ‘ouse and never darken t’ door again. Aye!”
Bearing in mind prejudiced southern tradition has it that Northern cuisine is slightly less than healthy.
but perhaps… when you’re a tough mill worker that says ‘Aye’ a lot … perhaps all you have to eat is some herbs, stolen by night from the Squire’s garden… causing a herb related family feud that echoes down through the generations….etc, etc. Don’t think so. It’s actually froma proverb from t the King James bible – “Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a stalled ox and hatred therewith.” Yeah. Whatever. Anyway, it’s very dramatic and great fun and easier to get through than many other historical dramas.
Any-road up (these accents are catching) That’s my short (very short) list of Herb TV shows – if ypou have any please pop them onto our Facebook page. See Ya. Holly
